Relationship Status: [Still] Single

I know I am most likely a stranger to you. I know I’ve never met you in person and probably never will but I have an urgent prayer request to ask for you to pray for. See… my future husband is blind and needs supernatural healing of his eyes because he’s obviously having trouble seeing me. 😉 OR he might be possibly suffering from the “Not-Being-Able-To-Ask-For-Directions Syndrome” because he hasn’t found me yet. OR maybe he just lost his calendar and watch and hasn’t realized that maybe, just maybe the time has come to leave the good ol’ single days behind. I really don’t know what it is… but please keep him in your prayers… I’m starting to get worried. 😉

I’m just kidding… (obviously), although one of my leaders did tell me that he will start praying for my husband to be healed from blindness because he surely must be blind if he can’t see how “oh-so-marriage-material” I am. 😉 I’ve been laughing ever since he told me that. But that implies that he’s already in my life and who says that he is? It’s either he needs healing from blindness or from being lost. I guess one day I’ll know which one… for now I’ll just keep praying 😉

On a more serious note: my teen girls gave me until the end of this year before they give up on me ever leaving my state of singleness behind and having to resort to cat ministry for life. I have absolutely nothing against cats. But the one and only cat I ever have around me (her name is Princess… of all things) 😉 doesn’t seem to like me very much. She usually growls when I’m around or runs away, which makes me think cat ministry might not be my calling. I’m already off to a pretty bad start. 😉 But then again, being a nun for life is still available… although I’m not Catholic so I might have to do something about that… 😉

But on a REAL serious note: just like any season of life the season of singleness has both its highs and its lows, its perks and its painful moments. Sometimes I do find myself wondering… “does my future husband really exist out there in this world somewhere? Or am I wishing, dreaming, praying for a person that I’ll never get to meet?” I remember  when I went wedding gown shopping with my best friend before her wedding last year and she was trying on beautiful, flowing white dresses I was looking at her in the mirror and thinking to myself “will I ever even get to wear a beautiful white dress and walk down that aisle to say my vows?” Or sometimes when I watch my sister with her two beautiful little girls and her husband at home I wonder “will I ever have someone to come home to? Will I ever have a little child call me “mommy”?” I honestly don’t know.

I read what Paul writes about staying single for life in the Bible and I don’t like it. Honestly. Me and Paul? We don’t see eye to eye on that subject. I’m happy he did the whole “single for life” deal, but I don’t want that to be me. Sorry to disappoint you Paul. Not all of us can do it.

I remember talking to my mentor recently about life, ministry, love and everything in between. She’s one of those people that inspired me and challenged me in every area of my life from a very young age. She’s my role model in both ministry, career, and especially in her family life. But she got married pretty late. (Around 26 or 27, that’s pretty late,especially in the Ukrainian world) 😉 She spent her single life ministering to people in the mission field. She loved God with her whole heart. She didn’t waste her singleness. And after watching one friend after another walk down that aisle she had her days of questioning God when her time would come AND if her time would come. She cried those same tears that sometimes I cry late at night when (I hope) no one can hear me and she wondered the same things that sometimes I wonder when it comes to this whole husband deal…

And one day…he came into her life, unexpectedly of course and nothing like she imagined him to be. But he was the one she waited for those many years. The one (she tells me now) is her best friend for life. The one she shares her joys and struggles with. The one she shares a passion for God and serving others with. The one that she’s raising a godly and loving family and building a wonderful life with. The one that was worth the wait.

And I used to think “God… help me have some of those character traits that I admire in her… help me be a good servant to others like her… but please… just don’t make me wait so long for my future husband to find me…” Selfish, right? 😉

During our last meeting she told me something that I know very well but still need to be reminded of once in a while. God’s timing is not my timing. Just because I feel like I’m “off schedule” on my timeline in life doesn’t mean that I’m off schedule on God’s. In fact… I’m right on schedule with God. God knows when the right time is for my husband to come along. It wasn’t yesterday, it’s not today (well… today’s technically not over yet… so he still has a chance to walk into my life and sweep me off my feet) 😉 and it may not be tomorrow but whenever it will be, it won’t just be the right time, it’ll be the perfect time.

And if he never ends up showing up… then all the lost, lonely cats in the world will be happy 😉

Are you waiting for something in your life? A spiritual breakthrough that seems like it will never come? A job that you think you’ll never land? A relationship that you think will never be restored? A child that you’re not sure you will ever have? Or maybe you’re like me and you’re waiting for the love that you’re not sure you’ll ever find…

Whatever it may be, learn to hand those needs and desires over to God. He knows not only what is best for you but also when is best for you.

Don’t waste this season of waiting on being discouraged about your future or who you are. Use this time to grow in Christ. To learn to love Him and be loved by Him. To trust Him. To exchange your worries, your burdens, and your desires for His Heavenly peace.

I could probably make a pretty long list of everything I learned during my season of singleness (and I probably will one of these days) 🙂 but what I think I’m learning the most is to use this season of my life wisely. I will never get this precious time back and I don’t want to waste it worrying about what it is that I feel I “don’t have”.

Each season comes with its own “wants”. When you’re single you want to find that best friend to share the rest of your life with. When you’re married you wish for that free time and freedom that you had in your single days. When you have children you dream of having time to yourself and some uninterrupted sleep. 😉 That’s just how seasons of life are. You go from one to another… desiring different things in each one but the best thing to learn early on is to enjoy the one you are in at the moment. Because usually… it won’t last forever.

So… whichever season you may currently find yourself  in – enjoy it, make it worthwhile, love it… because you’re never going to get it back. 🙂

Be blessed and please don’t forget to pray… for my blind or lost husband. 😉

[Image creator unknown. Please respond if you know the author so credit can be given.]

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3 thoughts on “Relationship Status: [Still] Single

  1. Pingback: From my heart to yours | A journey of faith...

  2. Hello Anna! You don’t know me (Im from California) but somehow on FaceBook someone referred your blog, I checked it out, and have been receiving your updates ever since. Just wanted to tell you that your most recent one hit home (about being single!) and though I am only turning 21, who my future husband is or when he will come around is something I think about a lot as well. 🙂 I especially liked what you said at the end – about enjoying whatever season you are in. This is something that I also feel God has been teaching me, since the seasons of our lives fly by so fast! Well all I wanted to say was good job with that blog (being Ukrainian too I know singlebess can be a sensitive topic to bring up if you are over the age of, say, 20…) and that there are many sisters in the same boat as you out there! May you have a blessed day! 🙂

    Date: Wed, 24 Oct 2012 22:08:52 +0000 To: denachka@live.com

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    • Hi Denachka (I think that’s your name based off of your email):)

      First of all…thank you for stopping by and replying to the post. It’s always good to get feedback from readers especially if they are in the “same boat” as me in life. 🙂

      You are right that this can be a more “sensitive” topic in the Ukrainian community, but I think it’s an important one since it seems that we are no longer getting married at 18 and 16 anymore (thank God for that! :)) and living out as a single “adult” isn’t something I learned about when I was young (since I should have been married 5 years ago and have at least 2 kids by now) 😉

      But it’s definitely a season of life that we can use to glorify God in with our time, our resources, and our talents rather than sit around and worry while we wait for Prince Charming to roll up. 😉 Although I’m sure they’ll all come into our lives one of these days. 😉

      Wishing you the best during this time/season in your life as well. May you use it wisely! Be blessed! 🙂

      Like

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