At a dead end

ALONEThese last few weeks of my life it seems like God had only one agenda on His mind: take me through some of the toughest “courses” in His handbook.

Patience 101. Faith 200. Trials 401. Humility 302. Perseverance 203.

Why I’ve been going through these courses, I haven’t quite figured out yet.

I don’t remember ever signing up for them.

I don’t remember asking God to add me to the roster for any of these particular classes.

But I have learned that when it comes to these things no registration is required.

No entrance fee is necessary.

God decides it’s time to teach you a few things in life and off to class you go.

Whether you choose to or not.

Whether you like it or not.

He teaches, you learn, and then you get tested.

And tested.

And tested.

In all kinds of ways.

And when one test is over… you’re on to the next one.

Unless of course you fail.

Then you get to repeat the test again.

Or the course.

Or both.

Two weeks ago I found myself sitting right in front of a dead end sign.

After driving around in circles for an hour with absolutely nowhere to go.

My worship music playing softly.

Just crying out to God.

And as I sat there at that dead end I felt like that was it.

I could not go one more step.

I couldn’t handle one more test.

I didn’t know if I was strong enough to move on to the next course.

I wanted to call it quits.

I felt like I was being stretched in every direction possible. Like God was picking me apart piece by piece, showing me little by little every dark spot in my life.

Every weakness.

Every tiny thing that stopped me from being the person I wanted to be.

And I had enough of it.

I had not only reached a physical “dead end”, I felt like I had reached a spiritual dead end as well.

A place where I didn’t know which direction to go anymore.

A place where everything was pretty dark and lonely.

A place that I wanted to run far away from.

As I sat there in the dark trying to grasp to any hope I could find while reciting encouraging scriptures from God’s Word I couldn’t help but think “Why, God? Why me? Why now? I don’t think I can hold out any longer. I don’t know if I can handle the next thing coming my way, I think I’m ready to call it good.”

And as I sat there, one discouraging thought after another running through my mind I could softly hear God speaking to my heart amidst my rushing thoughts and my unyielding emotions

I could hear Him say, “Anna… I never asked you to battle alone. On your own you won’t overcome the temptations coming your way. On your own you’re not strong enough to bear your burdens. On your own you won’t be able to endure the trials set before you.

But you are not on your own. I AM with you and I will never leave you.”

All of a sudden it all became crystal clear to me.

I know God is with me always.

I know He’ll never leave me or forsake me.

I know how to recite all the right scriptures to help get me through any storm, but for some reason it seemed like my vision was clouded by my overwhelming emotions, by my wrong thinking and I was living like the battles were my own to fight and the times of testing were my own to go through.

I had somehow slowly let the lie that I was supposed to do it all on my own slip into my mind.

And it took coming to that “dead end” to help me realize that the only reason I ended up there was because I tried so hard to do it on my own when all along I should have been depending on God to help me come out strong.

One of the biggest and most destructive lies you can let yourself believe is that you have to do it all on your own.

Because on your own you’re the weakest.

You’re the most vulnerable.

You’re the easiest to bring down.

But God never asked you to go through life on your own.

He doesn’t allow storms to come into your life only to leave you in the middle of them to battle by yourself.

He promised that He would be your strength when you don’t have the strength left to take one more step.

To be your Rock to lean on when you can’t go on any longer.

To be your provider when you have come to the end of yourself.

To remind you that you are His precious child and He’s got it all under control even when it feels like it’s all falling apart.

Yes, on my own I am a weak, sinful, and hopeless human being.

But I am not on my own and neither are you.

On my own I would be stuck at a dead end every day of my life.

But I am learning to stop doing it on my own.

Because my God is with me and He is greater than my deepest fears, my biggest failures, my hardest struggles and in Him alone will I find victory for any test, trial, or temptation that will come my way.

Never forget.

God Almighty is by your side.

He will fight for you.

He will help you overcome things you would never be able to conquer on your own.

He will help you be victorious over everything you have to face today.

Don’t let yourself reach a dead end to realize that you were never meant to do it all on your own.

Be blessed and walk strong with God!Anna… 

“Nevertheless, I am continually with you; you hold my right hand.” -Psalm 73:23

never aloneRelated Posts:

desertforgottenwhen-life-is-too-hard-to-handle-life-hardshipsImage creator unknown. Please respond if you know the author so credit can be given.

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29 thoughts on “At a dead end

  1. I used to pray that God would take away my trials and hard times, but now, although sometimes I still do find myself asking that, I pray that God will give me what I need to get through them and I try to lean on Him. I try to leave my burdens at His feet and trust Him with complete confidence. I say “try” since I don’t always succeed in doing this. Like you said we always get a redo. I have also found I can have joy and peace in the midst of trials, by keeping my eyes on Him and not focusing on the problems. By praising Him and thanking Him in and for all things. Like I said, I try. Thanks for your thoughts. James said, “Count it all joy when you face various trials” I used to think that was crazy, but now I see why. It brings patience which in this case is endurance. We learn to lean more on Him. Love this.

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    • “I have also found I can have joy and peace in the midst of trials, by keeping my eyes on Him and not focusing on the problems.” I couldn’t agree more Wendy! As much as I wish I never have to go through another storm, valley, or trial I know God only allows them to strengthen us and make us depend on Him. I’m thankful that we don’t have to handle all of life’s problems on our own. Jesus is right there beside us every step of the way!

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  2. I believe everyone really have been and continuously taking these courses without them even knowing, hahaha 😀 It is really better to seek and ask God during the test “Lord what do you want me to learn?” than complain and ask “Why do I have to go through with this?” 🙂 ( I suddenly miss schooling 😛 ) Thanks Anna! ♡ God’s love is with you forever ♡ #JustKeepOn

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    • Yes!!! I’m sure that’s very true. Sometimes we don’t even know until the very end that God signed us up for those courses 😉 I don’t know if I’ll ever miss His “schooling” but at least I know it will be put to good use in the future, unlike half of my algebra and trigonometry courses 😉 Have a blessed day Mae!

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  3. I think you’re sitting in the desk in front of me! At my breaking point, Abba gave me this wonderful verse:
    Even to your old age, I am He,
    And even to gray hairs I will carry you!
    I have made, and I will bear;
    Even I will carry, and will deliver you.
    Isaiah 46:4

    Shalom!
    \o/

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  4. something that I’ve been learning lately (and boy do I hate it) is that most growth doesn’t come without discomfort. oh how I wish I could grow and become more mature and Christ-like without the discomfort, but it doesn’t usually work that way.
    thank you for your words Anna, will keep you in my prayers 🙂

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    • Thank you 🙂 I wish it worked that way as well… but nothing really ever comes out of our comfort zone does it? It’s better to be uncomfortable in the unknown with Jesus then comfortable and staying in the same place without Him!

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  5. This post…you nailed it! I’ve been right where you were, and asking the exact same questions. Haven’t we all? And He pulled me through it all-the tests, the refining…and through those experiences, my faith was strengthened in ways I didn’t expect. Not a pleasant period to go through, but it drew me closer to Him, and it was all worth it. I hope I can remember that the next time He signs me up for another one of these courses!

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    • Thanks Jen. Yes, times of testing and refining always have a way of drawing us nearer to God as we rely on His strength and guidance to make it through. As much as I’d love to have an easy, problem-free life I know that’s the kind of life that would make it much easier for me to forget God and my dependency on Him. I’m grateful for hardships that brought me closer to Him and strengthened me in the long run. 🙂 Hope you have a blessed day!

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  6. I have been facing storms lately as well!
    Today I came across this verse:
    Isaiah 66:9 (NCV)

    9 In the same way I will not cause pain without allowing something new to be born,” says the Lord.

    Reading that verse over and over again gives me new hope!

    Would love for you to drop by and read my post from last week “Sometimes we just need a do over”. God bless!

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    • What a beautiful and hope-filled verse Miranda. Thank you for sharing it with me. God always has a reason for allowing us to go through any kind of trials or pain in this life. That’s such a comforting reminder to cling to. I’ll make sure to check out your post. Be blessed!

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  7. Ah…Holy Spirit University! Kind of like Hotel California. You can check out anytime you like but you can never leave. If you don’t pass the test, that’s okay, you get to take it again! There are no failures in His school, just retries and lots of love to get us through… 🙂

    Great insights here while you’re in the thick of it, Anna. The dead end just means God has an awesome new direction to show you. Blessings.

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    • Holy Spirit University… love it! I will start referring to it as that from now on. 🙂 It’s certainly tougher than any universities in this world! But God is the greatest teacher and His “courses” are always for our own good (at least that’s what I keep reminding myself of). Thanks for your encouragement Mel. I sure hope I will “pass” soon and be on my way to wherever God chooses to lead me next. Be blessed!

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    • Hey, was reading through these comments and couldn’t resist replying to yours…love your term, Holy Spirit University! Great concept, I’ll remember that one! ~ Sheila

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  8. Thanks for being transparent and open about the trials you have been going through. I also regularly find myself at these same “dead-ends” and I have the same conclusion, to realize i can’t do anything without Christ, and that He was right there waiting for me to let go of my own attempts on my own strength. Each time it humbles me, helps me to have compassion on others, and helps me to see my need for Him to clean out the “dark corners” in my life that I thought were clean. God bless you Anna, it’s always encouraging to hear what God has been teaching you and how honest you have been on your dependence on Jesus Christ 🙂

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  9. Amen Anna, On my way through a dark valley a few years ago the Lord reminded me of all I had preached to others over the years. He asked me “Do you really believe all you have testified of?’
    I knew then that it was important for me to let Him help me through my valley of the shadow of death not just because of me but because there were countless others watching me and waiting to see what I would do in the shadows.
    So I set out and GOD WAS FAITHFUL! He met me everyday. In every meltdown He was there. In every frustrated cry He compassed me about. In my case no miracle of reversal came. No magic prayer seemed to be answered but in the midst of my devastation and sorrow God healed me and made me whole. I think perhaps that is more amazing to me and others than any other answer to my prayers could have been.

    You are in my prayers today.

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    • Wow Joseph. What an amazing testimony of God’s faithfulness to you as you trusted Him in your valley. It’s easy to encourage others going through hard times but when you have to face your own it seems so much harder to believe those same truths and promises of God for yourself. I’m so glad that He was there for you (as He is for me) and that by leaning on Him you not only came out stronger, but also encouraged others to do the same. May you continue walking faithfully with Him in everything that comes your way. Be blessed!

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