But all you feel is darkness inside.
Everyone is out and about enjoying festivities.
And all you want to do is sit at home and hide.
Everyone is talking about plans for the new years and how bright the future looks.
And all you can worry about is whether you will make it through one more day.
One more day of tears.
One more day of pain.
One more day of wondering when it will all be over.
All you see ahead of you is darkness.
There is pain from your past that keeps you locked up in chains.
And there are wounds from people that never seem to heal.
You know the truth about God’s love for you and His purpose for your life.
But when you read His promises they are just empty words on a page that never make it to your heart.
He used to be the One you ran to for your healing, for your forgiveness, and for your hope.
He was your light in the darkness, your shelter in the storm, and your answer in the unknown.
But now you don’t see your answer in Him.
You see it in the bottle of pills lying in your drawer.
You see it in the blade that you use to cover up the pain you feel inside.
You see it in the stack of invitations inviting you to one more party to attend.
And yet everything you try to do doesn’t numb your pain.
You feel like you’re walking through life with a pair of sunglasses on that distort your reality.
Where once you saw sunshine now you see darkness.
Where once you saw hope for the future you see a dead end.
Where once you saw a reason to live you now see emptiness.
And with each passing day you wonder how much longer you can walk before you quit.
How much longer you can wear the painted smile on your face to cover up the pain inside.
How much longer you can fool the people around you into believing that you are doing just fine.
How much longer you can pretend you’re going to be okay when all you want to do is die.
How much longer you can carry the burdens of the world that have fallen on your shoulders.
And if one day… it will all somehow end.
If this is you today…
If you feel hopeless and hurt, broken and scarred by the world.
If you feel like there is no healing that can come for what happened yesterday and there is no hope that you have for what tomorrow will bring.
If you feel like you will find the answer to your problems at the bar, in a blade, or in a bottle of pills.
If you feel like you are worthless and you have nothing to offer to the world you live in.
Then today I want to tell you something that you need to hear.
I don’t know your story and the reason of your scars.
I don’t know why yesterday brings you so much heartache and why tomorrow seems like nothing more but a dark cloud.
I don’t know why your knees keep shaking, why the tears keep coming, and why your heart is at the brink of giving up.
I don’t know what hurtful words people threw your way or what lies the enemy has been whispering in your ear.
But even though I don’t know your name, your story, or where you live.
Even though I don’t know what storm, or trial, or prison you find yourself in I DO know one thing.
I know that thousands of years ago a baby boy came down from heaven so that He could prove to you how much He loved you.
I know that thousands of years ago a man named Jesus walked on this earth and went through temptation, through trial, and through abuse from others to prove to you that He knows exactly what you are going through.
I know that thousands of years ago the son of God hung on a cross with scars all over His body and a thorn of crowns on His head to show you that you were worth the brutality, the mocking, and the pain just so that He could spend eternity with you.
I cannot give you an answer to when you storm will end.
To when your scars will fully heal.
To when the light will appear on your horizon again.
But I can bring you to the One who will walk with you every step of the way.
To the One who will dry your tears and show you that you are not hopeless with Him.
To the One that will mend your broken heart and show you that your tomorrow will be better with Him.
Your healing, your hope, and your reason to live came thousands of years ago in a tiny little boy held in Mary’s arms.
A baby boy whose name is Jesus which means “God with us.” (Matthew 1:23)
So today… remember.
God is with you.
In your storm.
In your heartache.
In your trial.
And in your pain.
Your day might still be dark today but He is your light, He is your Good Shepherd, and He WILL make a way.
You will never be helpless with Him.
I hope you are feeling merry and bright these celebration days but if you are not please remember that you have a reason for hope, you have a reason to look forward to your future, and you have a reason to rejoice. And that reason is Jesus. If you need some extra prayer this holiday season please make sure to email me so I can keep you in my prayers. Be blessed -Anna… ♥
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