When doors close

storm, strugglesA few weeks ago my boss sat me down and decided to give me an early Christmas gift.

He told me I had to start looking for a new job.

It was totally unexpected and out of the blue.

Just like that I found myself standing with a closed door in front of me and an uncertain road ahead.

The weird thing is that after getting over the initial shock of the fact that my life was about to change instead of being worried about the future I had this peace in my heart that made absolutely no sense.

Not just peace, but excitement because I know God doesn’t close doors without opening new ones and though uncertain, I know that He knows what He’s doing and He’ll get me on the next path that He wants me on.

I felt like Peter when he found himself in the middle of the storm walking on water with this total confidence that as long as I looked to Jesus He would help me keep on going with Him.

Waves are all around me and my steps are a little shaky but as long as I trust Jesus I’ll get to where I need to be.

Some of my co-workers were talking about having to look for a new job and how what happened next was up to them because they were in control of their destiny.

And all I could think was “I’m not worried because I’m not in control of my destiny. GOD is.

I had this sure confidence that everything would turn out alright.

Losing my job might shake me a little and stretch my faith but it would not only be an end, but a brand new beginning for me.

An opportunity to step into something else that God has in store.

I knew that even though I didn’t see the big picture I could trust God in my circumstance.

Nothing could destroy my faith.

Or so I thought.

Because a funny thing happened two days ago.

Something seemingly insignificant but it made me take my eyes off of Jesus and fall apart.

My check engine light went on in my car.

And it kind of went downhill from there.

The last time that light went on in my car I had to pay almost a thousand dollars to have my car fixed and all I could think at that moment was “I can’t afford that right now. I don’t know how much longer I’ll have my job.”

Then I thought about how I was going to the dentist the next day and the dentist thought that I might need a root canal for one of my teeth and I couldn’t afford that either.

And then I thought what if God won’t come through for me and there is no open door at the end of this whole thing?

What if I can’t afford to pay rent and need to move out of my apartment?

What if there is no blessing in disguise or silver lining that I can’t see?

And just like that my fears took over and my faith came tumbling down as I kept on thinking about all the things that could go wrong.

Like Peter I stopped looking at Jesus and started looking at the waves crashing around me, at my uncertain situation, and that peace and joy and certainly I felt before all slipped away.

I spend so much time encouraging people on my blog to trust in God but now that I found myself in the middle of the storm I wondered if I trusted Him myself.

I wondered if I truly believed that God would make a way.

I had a vulnerable moment (as I’m sure you have at some point) and the enemy made sure to use it against me.

To get me so distracted by my circumstances that I took my gaze off of Jesus and onto my problems and uncertainties.

And it worked.

But not for long.

Sitting in my car with worries in my mind, fear in my heart, and tears on my face I decided to do the only thing I know to do when I feel overwhelmed.

My solution has always been and will always be one thing: worship.

So I turned up my worship songs in my car and I sang my heart out about a God who loves me and is faithful in taking care of me.

About a God who hears, and sees, and listens to our every single need and prayer.

About a God who can make a way out of any dead end.

And I told the enemy “nice try, but I am still looking at the One who goes before me, sure you gave me a little scare, but my eyes will remain on Jesus and not your lies.”

I know who my God is, He has been faithful in the past and He will continue to be faithful in the future in providing for me.

I’m believing those words from the song “Oceans” by Hillsong.

“He has never failed and He won’t start now.”

He won’t fail me in my storm and He won’t fail you in yours.

I know you might have moments like me when you take your eyes off of Jesus and get overwhelmed by what is happening in your world, but don’t let those moments turn into days.

Turn your eyes back on Him and keep on walking forward in faith.

You will never walk on water if you are too busy looking at the waves and you will never get past your problems if that’s all you look at every day.

Look at Jesus instead.

As long as Peter kept his eyes on Jesus he kept on walking in the middle of that storm.

And as long as you do, you will as well.

Remember to keep your eyes on Christ and He’ll help you stay strong with Him. And if you can please keep my job search in your prayers. I’m trusting God that His open door for me will come soon. Be blessed! -Anna… ♥

“And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus.” -Philippians 4:19

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46 thoughts on “When doors close

  1. I’ve only read this now, Anna, and I am truly blessed and encouraged. I too, fall into the dark recesses of my mind at times, forgetting for a moment on whom our Source truly is!

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  2. Thank you Anna! I just had a door that I thought would never close bang sometime in November 2014 and am still trying to get over it. Some days are better than others. I’m having one of the “others” type of days and your post really helped. Please keep up the good work

    Oh and by the way I totally love oceans. It was my go-to song the whole of 2014. It never gets old to me.

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  3. Anna, you need to know that this was the biggest answer to my prayers. I have recently had some pretty big doors close in my life and I have been so afraid of the future! I haven’t understood why God has let certain things happen and I’ve been feeling so full of heartache because of all the things that could go wrong in my life now that this certain relationship is over that I never thought would be. It’s terrifying to me, and just now as I was pleading with God for guidance, your blog popped into my mind and this was the first post I saw! I don’t have answers still, but I know that I need to trust in Him and know that He loves me and that He will never let a door close without opening a better one in the future. I really do need to just focus on Jesus and take my eyes off the storm. Thank you SO MUCH, and best wishes with your job search! I know He will guide you!

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    • Hi Lauren, I love it when God speaks to us at the perfect moment! I’m glad this blog post encouraged you. Having a door close on a relationship with someone that we care deeply about is never easy to deal with because there is usually so many emotions, hopes, and memories connected with it but sometimes those relationships that we thought were meant to last forever are only meant to last for a season and once we realize that it becomes easier to take the lessons we learned from the relationship and move on. If God can close a door in your life He can certainly open up a new one. I have no doubt that in time He’ll open one for you and you’ll appreciate the fact that He closed the one He did. Things might go wrong… but there is an even higher chance that they will go right for you because God is in control and He’ll make everything happen the way it needs to at the right time. Never stop trusting Him, and like you said, keep your eyes on Him, not the storm around you. He will get you through! Be blessed!

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  4. I’m very glad with the way you looked at it. (: 😊 we all have those moments of uh-oh but I’m so excited for you because I know He has this all planned out for you. 😊☺️😉

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  5. Hey sis tears formed in my eyes because I have actually been through so many trails & test this year I was so over everything I even asked god why did he spare me from a car accident i was in this year. But then I seen this precious baby on yahoo who had a terrible disease I never knew existed and it humbled & snapped me back. I said father I’m here mad because my car totalled out, my hours getting cut at work, this company ripped me off so now I have to fight for my money back, my love life is non existent but this precious innocent baby have a disease where any skin contact with anything is painful and causes her skin to blister & fall off. I felt so sad because while I was mad I could of been praying for her healing & I may not have much but I am blessed that when I make skin contact it doesn’t hurt, I’m blessed that I can see,hear walk & talk so how could I be so ungrateful. I realized when your Christian you have others who need prayers and love so I can’t be selfish its people who need the little help and the sincere prayer I have to offer. Hopefully my situation could help you. Sis you are loved and favored in the lord his anointing is on your life. I can feel his love in your writing and he is going to take care of you just wait and see we are his children & he is our father so rest in the lord & know that something beautiful is in store for you. Love ya sis.

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    • Hi Jasmine, God really brought you through a lot this year! It does help sometimes to see life through another person’s point of view and realize that even in our struggles and misfortunes we are a lot more blessed then so many people out there. When we take our focus off of ourselves and onto others we have less time to worry about our issues and more time to help others with theirs! Thank you so much for your kind words of encouragement! I know I can trust God without a doubt to take care of me! He is a faithful Heavenly Father who ALWAYS meets the needs of His children. 🙂 I hope you have a wonderful Christmas. ♥ Be blessed!

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  6. Prayers are surrounding you . . . thank you for being real . . . only as we share our joys and our STRUGGLES can people ‘see’ our faith walk is real and that God IS in control of all things. May His peace continue to permeate your being, and your heart overflow with His JOY. He must have something wonderful in store for you my dear sister!

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  7. My contract ended on September 19th and in the midst of the storm I took my eyes off My Sweet Jesus and broke down. The word I heard that encouraged me was- as long as you are alive God is not done with you. I told God that I would hold onto Him because He promises not to put me to shame. I had rent to pay and other expenses and God is so Faithful because I never lacked. On November 10th, I was called back for a month contract and on December 8th, I was employed on a permanent basis. Anna, it’s so true that God has never failed and He won’t start know. I’m praying for God to open doors for you and give you divine promotion. We serve an AWESOME God.

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    • Wow Rose, what an incredible testimony of God’s faithfulness in answering your prayers in your time of need. It was so encouraging for me to hear! Thank you for sharing your story. God is so faithful in taking care of us when we trust Him. I say it, and I believe it, and now I think it’s time for me to really experience it for myself! It can be a little scary facing the unknown but I know that I’ll be okay because I’m facing it with Him! Thank you so much for your words and for your prayers. I hope you have a very Merry Christmas!

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  8. definitely will keep you and your job search in my prayers! our Father knows what you need for each day and He will provide! And I totally agree – worship is the best solution, every time!

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    • Also, meant to say, I love the line in oceans, where it says ‘take me deeper, than my feet could ever wander, and my faith will be come stronger’, it makes me think of all those decisions that we would never choose to make on our own (like losing a job) that God can use to strengthen our faith.

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    • Thank you so much Emma. I really appreciate it! And yes… sometimes following God will take us places we would rather not go but I’m glad we can rely on Him to get us through and help us walk out even more stronger than before. I hope you have a wonderful Christmas. 🙂 Take care!

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  9. oh.my.word.

    you, too, eh…

    I’m just at the start of fruitloop upset… trying to wrap my head around something bigger than my “wonderful decisive abilities” can cope with.

    But I’m excited, too. Yes, I noticed my faith and calm…and then I freaked…and now I’m calm again.

    I’m quite…excited!

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  10. Thanks for sharing this personal experience Anna! I love your thinking here, “I’m not worried because I’m not in control of my destiny. GOD is.”

    Of course even when we think like that sometimes our emotions roll over us and we begin to sink into the waves again. It’s amazing to me how you came full circle in your thinking and feelings here. It’s a testimony to me that we just can’t let circumstances take our eyes off Jesus!

    Blessings to you and prayers as you seek out God’s next step in your life! May he give you a bold faith and opportunity to serve him in unexpected ways!

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    • Thank you Caleb! It is definitely harder some moments more than others but I’m glad I know God is in control and He’ll help me keep my emotions and mind in check when it starts wandering off onto my circumstances instead of Him. I hope you have a blessed Christmas!

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  11. Praying for you! Having our faith tested is never easy and often requires a process. And of course we see the growth and fruit of the testing in hindsight. Cant wait to hear about the open doors He gives at the end of your waiting, but looking forward even more to learning of the growth you will have experienced 🙂 2 Peter 1:5-9 (MSG)

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    • Thank you Samina. God has got it all under control! The news may have been a surprise to me, but it definitely wasn’t to Him. I’m excited (and a little nervous) to see where He will take me next. I wish you all the best as well!

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  12. Oh my heart! Oh ! I cannot express in words how desperately I needed this. I am reminded that God always finds a way. There is such turmoil in my life at the moment, and I have been drowning. How precious it is to have come across your blog, what a gift from God your words are! Thank you so very much for your honesty in your moment of weakness, it has put clarity in mine!

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    • Hi Shaneyak, I’m so happy God brought clarity to your situation through mine. He always helps us read the right things right when we need to hear them! I pray that He will help you see that He will be your strength, your peace, and your joy during what you are going through right now and that when it is all done you will come out so much stronger in Him than ever before. Keep on walking with faith with your eyes and heart on Him always. Be blessed! ♥

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  13. I’m in the same situation you are in. These may seem like insignificant problems to others but financial difficulties always put one to the test! We have a car issue as well with the check engine light and I have a dental problem too that I have no money to fix because I can’t find a job. Such a coincidence! And many other difficulties….But sometimes when you realize that you really have nothing and no one to go to for help or nowhere to go, you realize how much you only need God. I’m only getting through because of God. Without him, what and where would I be? But I sometimes feel that in the moment when it’s the hardest, that’s when you know that soon God will open something for you that you never asked for or expected. Winter is harsh, but that’s because spring is on its way. So I hold on to hope and never letting go of my Father’s hand. Praying for you to find a job and will you pray for me too, to find a job? God bless you Anna and I’m always inspired by the words that God puts on your heart to share with all of us.

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    • Wow. We really are in the same boat in so many ways! I love what you said “Winter is harsh, but that’s because spring is on its way. So I hold on to hope and never letting go of my Father’s hand.”(I might have to print in and post it on my wall somewhere!)

      It is when we run out of our own resources that we know the only way we can get through is by trusting in God. I’m always reminded of the story of the poor widow who was running out of food to eat and was preparing to die and yet God came through for her when she pretty much reached her last resource and He took care of her in such a surprising and beautiful way. When we’ve reached our own end that’s the best place for Christ’s work and power to begin!

      I will pray that He will be faithful in providing for both of us during this season and that we will have amazing stories to share of how He came through for us. May you always keep the faith and stay joyful in Him! ♥

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  14. Anna…….
    God is so good! I am speechless and amazed because of His grace and mercy! I say this because I have been going through exactly what you wrote about! Different situation but similar reactions. I had a new development with my case this week that sent me into a state of fear. I have been battling the negative voices in my head and yesterday I read the story of Peter walking on water and knew God wanted me to see something from the story but I didn’t.
    I see now what He wanted me to see…..!
    I need to keep looking to Him! He will get me through the storm! He has never failed me and He is not about to now! Something broke as I read your post! Thank you for obeying the voice of God by writing this! The truths you wrote helped me!

    About your job situation, I can’t help but think God has great things in store for you! Yes, a door has been closed but a greater and effectual door is opening for you! Get ready, because God has something amazing planned for you next year! This door HAD to close for the next part of His plan to start! Watch and see the kind of doors that are going to open for you! I am really excited for you Anna! A great testimony is going to come out of this! I will pray for you.
    God bless you!

    Rolain

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    • Hi Rolain, wow, I just love it when God inspires us to write something that He uses to encourage other people with (especially when you don’t understand why). I wasn’t thinking about writing about Peter and the storm at ALL yesterday until I sat down to write and that’s just what happened to come out. You are definitely in a place where you need to trust God to fight for you and when I am tempted to worry I always remind myself that the situation is not in my control and there is nothing I will do by worrying about it (other than make it worse). May you keep on staying focused on Christ in your storm and trusting Him to help you walk with Him to the end until this whole thing is over. I will be praying that you will have good news to share about your situation soon.

      And thank you for your prayers and words of encouragement for my job search. It’s definitely a position I didn’t plan on finding myself in but now that I’m here I know that God is in control and He’ll open the right door for me when it’s time. 🙂 I hope you have a blessed night. (or day, whichever one it is)!

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  15. Hii, Anna…Thx u sooo much…….Even Am also going through the same situation am in a confusion what to do,but u strengthen me by this post…. I’ll remember u in my prayers… And one more thing can u check ur mail plzz i send u some thing about my prayer request for this ID (annabachinsky@hotmail.com).Waiting for ur reply.

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  16. Wonderful post Anna, thanks for sharing your experience so openly. I also love “Oceans” and have found it a great encouragement in the last few months. May the Lord bless you abundantly, and may your next job be clear evidence of his love and provision for you.

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  17. Wonderful post, Anna, and I’ll definitely keep your job search in my prayers!
    “Oceans” is such a powerful song. It’s been an incredible source of encouragement for me in the past and I’m so glad it did the same for you! God bless you! ❤

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  18. Anna… this is a wonderful reminder for me. I am so touched by your honest words. So much is possible when we take our eyes off the waves and place them on Jesus.

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  19. Your words are inspiring anna. I’m trying to get a job too. I am from Nigeria. I love public relations and I’m very good at it. Sometimes when I see pictures of my mates in their offices, it scares me. I trust God but truthfully sometimes, I just get entangled with fear. I know God has a plan. Pls pray for the grace for me to be strong.

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    • Thank you Bukola. I will pray that God will help you have faith in Him instead of fear. Faith doesn’t mean that you won’t be scared about doing something (sometimes you still will be) it just means that you trust God is with you and He’ll help you do the things that may be out of your comfort zone despite your fear. I hope He will give you the strength to focus on Him and that He’ll provide a job for you that you’ll enjoy and be good at. Be blessed!

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  20. Beautiful! I get so excited when things go wrong now….it is the ultimate opportunity for God to show off. He will lead you to better things. Praise in the midst of the storm is the ultimate worship. Tell the devil to get his hands off your property, your job, and kick him in the butt as you move on to something better. Good for you. Great post. I am looking forward to reading about your victory.

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    • I’m totally with you on that Wendy! I used to look at problems as obstacles and now I try to look at them as opportunities to trust God and see His work and power in my life. It’s not easy to keep my eyes on Him at all times (those waves can be tempting to look at) but I know everything happens for a reason with God and I’m believing that something better will come along! He is able to turn anything around. 🙂 Have a blessed night! ♥

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